So then, what’s a Lamborghini got to do with a MV Agusta 312-R? Everything… and nothing. The nothing? Well, it’s a car. The everything? They’re both erotic.
MV and Lambo both have long histories built on passion. They have been financed by backgrounds of mass-market success, then endured a near-death bankrupt ‘70s experiences. Both brands have been exhumed and resurrected in single-minded breath-taking works of art.
Both MV and Lamborghini wrap an edgy, bloke-porn, utterly lickable design around an unsubtly masculine powerhouse. Neither is made for the mass market, but for the small audience of exotica fans who willingly cash in the insurance, abandon the girlfriend and disregard personal comfort to have one. In the Lambo’s lineage is possibly the most beautiful car ever made, the late ‘60s Miura, while the MV Agusta F4 is possibly the most beautiful bike ever made.
It’s possible that Lamborghini’s passion may be syringed out by its new owner, the massive VW group, but we’re not too worried. One; we’re a bike mag, and two; at over half a million bucks second-hand, having one is as likely a reality as my dream about Lara Croft. An MV Agusta F4 312-R on the other hand, is only around $44,000 bucks. Hmmm. That’s a dream I could find a way to afford.
The leggy Italian gets more leg
It’s astounding to think Massimo Tamburini penned the F4 over 10 years ago. In line with his brilliant Ducati 916, the character oozing out of the F4 should be a lesson to the world about executing one man’s vision, rather than that of a focus group (1998 Gixxer, anyone?). The F4, debuting in 1998 as beautiful (but slightly porky), has been released in variants since, alongside a series of limited edition collectors items, such as the more recent Senna and the $200K CC (Claudio Castiglione) model.
The 312R is the latest F4 incarnation, and replaces the F4 1000 R. It’s been developed as a superbike-level track competitor. Changes to the 1000cc inline 4 (the name “F4” a credit to Ferrari for their F1 radial valve technology) target quicker and higher revs, and include a re-profiled, longer duration cam to get more in, then more out again.
The intake horns are shortened 10mm to enhance top-end power, along with 48mm (were 46mm) throttle bodies. Intake valves are 1mm bigger at 30mm and are made of titanium to decrease inertia, and are restrained by stronger valve springs.
All together this offers up an extra 500rpm and 9hp, taking the output to a not insignificant 183hp that still meets Euro 3! Further race fruit comes in the form of an extractable, cassette-type gearbox for quick and easy ratio changes.
Nice slippers
The Magneti Marelli 5SM brain not only controls the bang, but eliminates the need for a slipper clutch. What? The EBS (Engine Brake System), or as we termed it, the electric slipper, basically (very basically) blips the throttle for you on the down changes. MotoGP guys have been using like systems for a while, since they can be programmed to personal preference. The idea is to prevent engine braking from loading the front wheel and to help maintain in-corner neutrality.
It works thus: the number two cylinder inlet has a little air bleed just after the throttle butterfly. When you chop the throttle, a very wee magician inside the ECU arranges a little squirt of air and fuel in past the butterfly, sorted out to match the gear and speed decrease. This provides a great grumbly overrun noise and just enough deccelerative horsepower to overcome engine braking forces.
On very small on/off throttle openings you can hear the solenoid clicking. The running gear, or rather the sprinting gear, gets a massage too. Suspension wise, the front legs are straight out of an All Black front row. The massive 50mm Marzocchi carbon-nitrided USDs must surely be the chunkiest, stiffest, meanest mothers to grace any road bike. They have adjustable preload, rebound and compression. The only other bike I know of on the planet to boast 50mm forks is this year’s Husky Offroad range.
The Sachs-Racing shock is adjustable for rebound, high and low speed compression damping and offers hydraulic spring pre-load. This leans toward quick damping and balance setting changes for every track. To cover a larger part of important damping families, the 312R boasts an Ohlins steering damper.
Fa-fa-fa-fast
Bench racing the 312R in the luxurious MTN garages reveals a seat made of wood, low clip-ons and near fetal-positioned high pegs made for dwarves and little eye-taliano guys. And the crowd who has come to look at it. I turn it on. The speedo self-check flashes up “312”. Little tease. The F4 comes to life with the growl of mechanical things fighting. The sound on the go is much the same, and those used to the turbine Japanese whine will take fright. It growls and spits, offering up tappet noise and induction roar, and on the ride from the garage to the open road doesn’t seem to like me much. I like it though, and feel much more attractive to girls.
It heats up at the lights, or anywhere in town (your leg will let you know before the temp gauge does) and fueling below 4000rpm is patchy. It doesn’t cough or hiccup – it's just gruff. Weirdly, it’s not too terrible to get to work on if you disregard personal comfort for a second. There's not much driveline snatch and a useful first gear. At 4000rpm it smoothes out and 4200rpm equates to an extremely silky 100kph. I am annoying it by being in traffic though.
On the runway
Pin this exotica open, and hold on. A glorious basso opera of a 1000 mechanical Pavarotti’s erupts, and your thought abruptly turns into forward motion. Pulling cleanly from 4 grand, there’s a minor surge at 7000rpm and it hauls strongly to the 13,500 redline after that, where the huge volcanic growl from the quad-pipes is purposeful, but well muffled.
The 180hp is far less layered than the outgoing F4 1000R and (much like a Ducati) doesn’t feel quite as daunting as you’d expect. The torque curve peaks at 10,000rpm and remains there until only 600rpm short of the 13,500K limiter. It is fat, flat and useable, and lies down very rideably onto the planet.
In the lower gears the 312R whacks into the limiter like a Jerry Collins tackle. There’s no sensation of running out of puff to remind you to change gears, and the thing’s still pulling like a train when the brain kills the ignition. In the higher gears I was too busy either laughing or slightly scared to get anywhere near the limiter, but a bigger, redder shift-light on top of the fairing wouldn’t go amiss.
On the test bike there’s a discouraging vibration at 10,000rpm, and it’s back at the factory at the time of writing to find out the problem. As no other test has mentioned this I’ll withhold judgment until a diagnosis is made, but the powerpack overall lives up to the legend. Huge power, yet astoundingly useable and with character to burn. And no, I admit, I don’t know if it does 312kph.
I do know it gets very quickly to at least 280, where a sudden change in conditions dictated I test the radial Brembo P4/34 monoblocks very hard indeed. By gracious they work. My eyes nearly fell out. The brakes have an initial bite that is on the strong side for the road, but easy to modulate.
The calipers grip 320mm floating discs at the front, and supposedly a Nissin four-piston caliper grabs a 210mm disc at the back. The rear brake pedal could have dragged a stick for all I knew, as under hard braking the rear only very occasionally touched down and street-sweeps more than I like. This was one of my few niggles, probably mostly influenced by the origami ergos and my high pork-factor. Realistically it would only affect you on a track.
On the move, the F4 feedback is so precise and engaging I felt like a blind man running his hands along on the road to sense every cobble or undulation. It feels tiny, 250-like, to a degree because of the oompa-loompa peg height, but slim too, and my knees tuck close together under the wings on the tank. Initially, I’m probably going about as fast as a blind man too, and the F4 feels wooden and unresponsive.
The tiny amount of built-in flex that makes most litre-bikes easier to turn in, is not present and the F4 exhibits a trait that possibly shows its chassis age – a desire to stand up under brakes. I suspect the super-stiff 50mm fork legs also contribute.
Winding off a touch of fork compression (that Terry added for the track), and riding it properly saw the F4 come alive. Some muscle is still required to tip it in – the 24.5-degree head angle and 104mm of trail is quite conservative, but once in the turn it glues down strongly and is responsive and predictable.
The suspension is still stiff and is always going to be, but the trick of high-end suspension componentry is compliance and, though hard, it never jars and the wheels keep determinedly pressed on the tarmac. The F4 not only rewards hard use, but asks for it. I feel embarrassed about shortchanging it.
Back to il papa
I found myself punting the F4 a lot harder along the regular test loop than usual; the controllable, visceral urge lying down via the fabulous swingarm and beautiful Y-Spoke brembo wheels delivering the graceful yet deliberate feeling of a racebike let out on the road. Though I could out-moron it, the electric slipper worked invisibly and the soft decel at any revs is a revelation.
Back out in beam-me-home mode, the seat was uncomfortable and my ankles had welded to my butt. I could only see my elbows in the vestigal mirrors (the easiest way to use them pop your elbow out and peer through the gap) and my legs got cooked… and I couldn’t stop smiling. I was thinking about tomorrow.
The F4 will dismay the practical among us and enchant the lovers, like the disdain and hard edges of any tempestuous Italian model. You must put up with a few pecadillos for the looks, and bring your A-game to get the best from it. The F4 is not your slave and when you partner up just right, the result is just magic.
SPECIFICATIONS: F4 312-R
ENGINE
998cm³, four-cylinder, four-stroke, 16-valve, DOHC, radial valve
Compression 13:1:1
Bore x Stroke 76mm x 55mm
Max. hp (at crank) 134Kw (183hp) at 12,400 – Lim. 13,000rpm
Max. torque 115Nm (11.5Kgm) at 10,000rpm
Engine Mg. Weber Marelli 5SM ignition – injection integrated system; Multipoint injection
Clutch Wet, multi-disc
Gearbox Cassette gearbox; six-speed, constant mesh
Primary drive 50/79
Gear ratio
First gear: 13/38 126.5kph (78.5mph) at 13,000rpm
Second gear: 16/34 174.1kph (108.1mph) at 13,000rpm
Third gear: 18/32 208.1kph (129.2mph) at 13,000rpm
Fourth gear: 20/30 246.6kph (153.1mph) at 13,000rpm.
Fifth gear: 22/29 280.6kph (174.2mph) at 13,000rpm
Sixth gear: 21/25 Over 300kph (186.0mph) at 13,000rpm
Final ratio 15:40
DIMENSIONS AND WEIGHT
Wheelbase 1408mm
Overall lenght 2007mm
Overall width 685mm
Saddle height 810mm
Ground clearance 130mm
Trail 103.8mm
Dry weight 192kg
Fuel tank capacity 21L – reserve: 4L
FRAME
Type CrMo Steel tubular trellis (TIG welded)
Rear swingarm pivot plates: aluminium alloy
SUSPENSION
Fork 50mm carbonitrided Marzocchi with rebound-compression damping and spring preload 129mm travel
Shock Progressive, single Sachs with rebound and compression (high speed/low speed) damping and spring preload (hydraulic) travel 120mm
WHEELS
Front: Forged aluminium alloy 3.50 ” x 17 ” 120/70 – ZR 17 tyre
Rear: Forged aluminium alloy 6.00 ” x 17 ” 190/55 – ZR 17 tyre
